WOMAN
(TO WAITER.)

Don't argue.


MAN

It's normal. There'a always termite poop - or worm fat.


WOMAN

Yueck!


MAN

Often both. Only termite poop in this one. I guess that's why it's so expensive.

(THE WAITER FILLS BOTH GLASSES, EXITS.)

To a wonderful evening.


(SHE HESISTATES, THEN DRINKS. SHE
    LOOKS LIKE SHE EXPECTS TO THROW UP.)


WOMAN

Hey, it's good!


MAN

Yeah. You've got cute, tiny, tiny taste buds. Nothing should taste bad to you.


WOMAN

Thank you, I think?


(THE WAITER ENTERS WITH THE FIRST COURSE
 OF DINNER ON A SMALL CART, ALONG WITH A
FAT MAN WEARING WHITE GLOVES, IN AN
   ARTIST'S GOWN DECORATED WITH RIBBONS AND
  A MEDAL. ON HIS HEAD MUSHROOMS A BERET.
HE WAITS TO ONE SIDE WHILE THE WAITER
METICULOUSLY REARRANGES THE GLASSES,
   NAPKINS, AND UTENSILS ON THE TABLE, THEN
   CAREFULLY AND VERY REVERENTLY SERVES THE
DISHES.)


WAITER
(FINISHED SERVING.)

Enjoy your dinner. I envy you.


MAN

We'll see. Looks great, so far.


WOMAN

Hmmmmmm.

(THE WAITER EXITS. THE FAT MAN IN THE
   BERET STANDS AT ATTENTION CLOSE BY THE
TABLE. SHE NOTICES HIM.)

Who's he?


(HER DATE SHRUGS. IGNORING THE FAT MAN,
 THEY GET READY TO TRY THE FOOD. NOW THE
  FAT MAN TAKES A DEEP BREATH, SEEMS TO BE
GETTING READY FOR SOMETHING. TENSELY,
   HE POSITIONS HIMSELF TO GET THE BEST VIEW
OF THE FOOD ON THE TABLE. THE MAN CUTS
THE FISH AND VEGETABLES ON HIS PLATE,
   MOVES THE PIECES AROUND - OBSERVING THIS,
    THE FAT MAN SIGHS, GRIMACES, APPEARS TO BE
IN PAIN - THEN THE MAN TAKES A BITE AND
    BEGINS TO CHEW. OUT OF HIS HOVERING STANCE,
LIKE A VULTURE OF ART, THE FAT MAN
  IMMEDIATELY RUSHES IN. NOW HIS HANDS COME
INTO VIEW HOLDING A LONG PAINTER'S BRUSH
  AND FORK, WHICH HE WIELDS AS HE REARRANGES
THE CUT-UP, DESECRATED FOOD UNTIL IT IS
  AGAIN FIXED AESTHETICALLY ON THE PLATE. HE
  SIGHS IN RELIEF AND SATISFACTION, ADMIRING
 HIS WORK. HE STEPS BACK. THE WOMAN BREAKS
UP A CRUSTY ROLL ON A SIDE DISH. THE FAT
MAN RUSHES IN, PICKS UP THE SIDE DISH,
BLOWS AWAY THE CRUMBS ON IT, RETURNS IT
TO THE TABLE.)


MAN

Hey, what're you doing? Who the hell are you, anyway?!